SPEAKER_02 0:20

Welcome everyone. My name is Ashley and this is Christy. Hey. We're two brains, one bot. Okay, we have some fascinating things to talk about today.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

Oh my gosh. Give it to me.

SPEAKER_02 0:32

First, though, we gotta get some fun stuff out of the way because um I have to tell you about my daughter taking my daughter to the frozen play. Oh, yay. Oh my gosh. I took her to the frozen, like it's the Broadway musical play, but they did it at um our local like theater down in.

SPEAKER_01 0:47

That's incredible. It's incredible.

SPEAKER_02 0:49

It's the Hell Center Theater and it's amazing. The stage is so you're sitting, there's not a bad seat in that place. And it's circular, but it moves in like sections. It's incredible. And for this play specifically, and also the Titanic play that I saw a few years ago, so good.

SPEAKER_01 1:06

Yeah. We saw Beauty and the Beast there. Oh, other ones I've seen there. Oh, it's been a long time, but yeah, it truly is like magical. It's beautiful. It makes me cry.

SPEAKER_02 1:15

I love it there, yeah. Um, but I'm not kidding when I tell you I could see like the core memories being made for both her and me. Like a lot of the times you always remember it. She will. And I I was like mostly watching her, and it was so funny because that's why you cry. That yeah, but the it was the first time that she had ever been to a play before. And like we were trying to tell her, like, explain to her what it was on the way, like a couple days before, because she does better when there's like structure. Really?

SPEAKER_01 1:43

She is me. Okay. I am her. I was wondering. I was wondering, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:48

Um, but uh when like a little bit through the show, she whispers to me and she says, Mommy, when is it gonna be our turn to play? Oh shoot. It was really cute. Um, so yeah, she's been doing her own plays now since then, and I am thrilled.

SPEAKER_01 2:05

Oh, did you ever we had talked about like getting her not you and I, but I'm not her parent, but about you getting her like a a treasure chest of like dress up clothes.

SPEAKER_02 2:18

Not yet.

SPEAKER_01 2:18

Oh, you need to do that. Her birthday's coming up.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

But grandma's crushed it with uh Christmas because we got her her ho Halloween costume was Elsa. Yes, and then that got destroyed. She wore it on end. It's a perfect way to um to get rid of something. So grandma's got her a new one for Christmas, and so she's been wearing that, and she gifted the little sister, her other Elsa. So I've got two little Elsas, and they she just thinks it's amazing when they're both Elsa and they both have crowns, and it's you know, and her little sister idolizes her, so anyways. Um yeah, and she's gonna be my little musical girly, which I love. I love musicals, I love going to plays.

SPEAKER_01 2:56

So they're very fun, and it's just imaginative, it's just a just a different personality to engage in that.

SPEAKER_02 3:03

Because I I like to watch it, but I would never I'm just impressed at the skill level of these people. Yeah, they're they're amazing. You completely it's almost like reading a book where you like I get sucked in and like I'm there. Yeah, like gotta support the arts, gotta support the arts because we need the arts. Absolutely. Um, but in that, the reason why I'm bringing this up is that there was a song. So the the movie and the play are completely different. Well, not completely different. The main storyline is there, but they have to change it because of rights, you know, like oh, movie rights? Yeah, like they have to change it slightly, and also the way that things are structured.

SPEAKER_01 3:38

Yeah, obviously they're limited on what they can do, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:41

Um, but there's a song um about something that you were very passionate about, and it's Heig Heige Hooga Hooga Hooga Hooga's right. Yes. I don't know if you've heard that song, but it's a banger. Yes, it is. So, anyways, when that was happening, I was like, Oh, Christy would love this. And my daughter very much knows you, knows your voice, and she's like, Mommy, you should text her.

SPEAKER_01 4:01

Oh, she's so cute.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

But I wanted to save it for the pod. So um, so yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:06

Yeah, there's a whole hooga song that's not in the movie, but it's in the play. Oh yeah. Shoot, I feel like I I'm trying to think where I've seen.

SPEAKER_02 4:13

It was very cute. Frozen. I will tell you. It is also um, like there's a there's the actual Broadway play that's been recorded kind of like the way Hamilton was on Disney Plus. So that might have been where you've seen it.

SPEAKER_01 4:26

I just wonder if I've seen it at Hill. Or maybe like at a local um like high school.

SPEAKER_02 4:31

Oh, maybe. I don't know. Maybe they did a really good job. I was insanely impressed.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

But they always do.

SPEAKER_02 4:36

Um yeah, so that's that's just the that has nothing to do with my episode, but I just wanted to tell you about it because I've been thinking about it since.

SPEAKER_01 4:43

Oh, I love that she loved it. Yeah. Do you have anything else you want to talk about before we get into it? Um any corrections? Any I I did I feel like I did have a correction. Oh, I do have a correction. So in the episode about music, where I mean I sing beautifully. Yes. I have yet to be like contacted by anybody to to record, and that's okay. Like or sued for how well it matched. Yeah, just really there's just been no fanfare. And that's okay. I I did kind of think I would.

SPEAKER_02 5:19

Um, I'll tell you. Oh, my friend Devin was like very much like you need to take Christy's singing at the end and just make it your outro for every episode now because it's incredible. I forgot to go back and listen.

SPEAKER_01 5:31

Like, what Devin, which which one did you like? Maybe just like email me. Let me know. Um, no, but uh I did learn something, and I just honestly I didn't know much about the what did you call it? The bone conduction. The bone conduction, just because I'm just uh either earbud or like wire earplug girly. Um and so my husband pointed this out. He was like, hey, that like has been around for a long time. Yeah, and I didn't realize um but I see a lot of like the running community that wear those ones that like the headphones that are yeah, I had no idea. So I just wanted to acknowledge that I had no idea that that's what that was. I just I don't know what I thought. I thought maybe those people just didn't like something. I mean, I think they don't like something in their ear, but I imagine that those just worked by like the volume. Oh, yeah. I don't know. But yeah, no, that's not how it works. I didn't know how those worked in our.

SPEAKER_02 6:32

I didn't either, really honestly.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

And my um, we have this uh our cute friend, uh her son wears those a lot and he likes them. And I I didn't know how they worked.

SPEAKER_02 6:42

So they have um they have hearing aids as that type too for people who have sensitivity issues with things being inside their ear because a lot of the older population they end up getting like ear infections because they have to put something in their ear all the time.

SPEAKER_01 6:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:55

Um, and so yeah, that can help with that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:57

So my husband was like, You have indeed seen this technology before. Because I think I'd said like I had no idea about this, but it's one of those things that you're like, oh, it's been here in front of my face all along, and I just never made that connection. Right.

SPEAKER_02 7:11

Um, I have another correction for you. Um, this goes on to our Dexter update that we talked about. Um, I think I mistakenly told you I was like season two. I we started watching season four last night, so I don't know, girl. Very off. Yes. And on that update, I have to tell you, season four is where they introduce the Trinity Killer, and I'm struggling. I have been having to do that thing, like Dayton and I are watching it, and I have to kind of like play on my phone or something during the parts where it shows him because I can't I can't John Lithgow. Yeah, I can't be in it.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

He's a phenomenal actor. Oh, oof.

SPEAKER_02 7:49

Like I can't, I I had I was I've been having a hard time with this season specifically. It's it's the that part of like being there for the thing that I'm having a hard time with. When Dexter does it, they they don't show like they do with the Trinity Killer.

SPEAKER_01 8:04

Like they show it's very graphic, it's super graphic, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:08

And that doesn't typically bother me, but it's I don't, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 8:12

Yeah, it's it's hard. That's a hard season. It is a rough season. Well, good well, I mean, yeah, I guess good for you.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

Yeah. Anyways, I just wanted to correct that you had mentioned something about being disgusting and only already being through it and whatever.

SPEAKER_01 8:25

So I'm actually really trying to be kinder to yourself? Oh, the opposite. I'm trying to like like stretch my eyeballs and make myself watch things so I'm not so screamish.

SPEAKER_02 8:37

I meant talking kinder to yourself. About what? Because you had said before, do you want to hear something disgusting? I'm already on season seven. Oh, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 8:48

Yeah. I it's it's very weird. I don't feel like I watch a lot of TV, but I apparently do. Well, because in conversations with friends, they're always like, Oh, Christy's like, have you seen this? Have you seen this? And have you seen this? And I'm like, Okay, I watch a lot of TV, you guys. Gosh. But you also do other things. Yeah, I do. We only watch like a show a night.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

Yeah. And that's your bonding moment. That's your bonding time. We we did the same. Um, I will say, I had a friend after we listened after she listened to that episode, her name's Becky. She said, and you know Becky. Yeah, she was like, I'm so jealous of Christy and her teenage kid life.

SPEAKER_00 9:24

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:24

I'm so jealous of that because her and I are just like in the trenches, but yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_01 9:31

I I've already gone through the trenches of uh toddler. Toddlers, and yeah, I'm just like, I am I am thriving in this new era. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:43

So you are thriving, and your kids are wonderful. Oh, they're good. I know I tell you that all the time, but they're wonderful. Every time I'm I'm like around them, they're very peaceful. I'm like very calm, yeah, which is completely opposite from my house.

SPEAKER_01 9:55

My house is constantly frozen and they're they're very, very, very good kids, but it's just they're independent. Good. I'm proud of them for that. And they're super cute, and they listen to pods every night. And so I'm sure when I go to bed one night I'll be hearing this exact segment. They are, they're very good kids. So and they get they get along for the most part with each other, which is also very helpful. So yeah, good. Props to you, kiddos.

SPEAKER_02 10:21

Shout out to the kids, and Becky, you'll get there someday. I know we will ender. Yeah, it's the little wins. We celebrate being able to take them to plays or take them to the movies, or you know, we're getting there. But that's not to say that we don't also love the chaos. Like we got together the other night with them and our kids played good together, and like we're having to kind of talk a little bit louder to each other, but at least the kids are playing and having a grand time, you know.

SPEAKER_01 10:47

Like so we it's we're embracing making work at the stage that you're in, recognizing, you know, like, oh yeah, we don't get to hang out very late, but nobody wants to hang out late. That's gross. So true.

SPEAKER_02 11:00

So so true. Um, okay, so now that we got the fun stuff out of the way, I'm gonna get a little bit unhinged, maybe a little dark on you. You unhinged, dark? No. Oh my gosh. Just from our listeners, everyone, please start constructing your tinfoil hats now. If you're driving, pull over. Do it. I know you keep that tinfoil on the back.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

My rescue tinfoil.

SPEAKER_02 11:27

Um, because your girl is about to drop some bizarre shit. Oh, I can't wait. I love it. But before I go on too much of a tangent, I need to give a little bit of context on um where they got the idea for what we're talking about today. And I don't really consider myself much of a conspiracy theory girly. Like, clearly, from my intense reaction to your Flat Earthers episode.

SPEAKER_03 11:49

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:51

Um, I uh, you know, conspiracy thinking is not my jam.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

I like some conspiracy theories when they're fun.

SPEAKER_02 11:59

Yeah, funny ones for sure.

SPEAKER_01 12:00

Like dumb ones.

SPEAKER_02 12:01

Yeah, well, we'll see how you feel about this one. Okay. This rabbit hole was a fun one, I will say that. Um, so okay, be honest. Okay. Does everything since 2019 feel like it's happening to someone else? Almost like we're observing our reality from the outside while simultaneously living in it somehow. Like a glass case of emotion.

SPEAKER_01 12:23

Uh maybe. How do you want me to answer?

SPEAKER_02 12:28

How do you want to answer? I'm gonna go with genuinely.

SPEAKER_01 12:30

I'm gonna go with a solid maybe. Yeah, a solid maybe. Okay. Um, well if you think about it like a little bit deeper, yeah. It's like it's more of a be so for real. Be so for real. Yeah. Like you are, you are not, this is not happening. This is not happening. You are not truly saying that or doing that or whatever. Yeah. Okay, yeah. 100%. Okay. So I changed my mind.

SPEAKER_02 12:53

Yes. Okay. I'm glad we came full circle. Should we just are we we done? Yeah. So just follow us on all the socials. Get out of here. Um, so people often talk about the before times. And when we talk about the before times, we're always referring to COVID. Yeah. Like there's a very clear, huge milestone marker of our lives, which to millennials, we're tired of living through historical times. Like we just want some normalcy. It's not nearly as fun as it looked in the brochure. Like, I am tired, grandpa. Exactly. So, anyway, the other day at work, we were kind of commentating on this like this reality and how it doesn't feel real anymore. And we keep going on about our normal day, writing our emails, and what does it matter? And what does it matter? Like, um, we're doing our normal day jobs and tasks while monumental things are happening every single day. Like, literally, the entire soundtrack of the last five to six years has been Aaron Parnas saying breaking news and newscasters talking about unprecedented times like we just talked about. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:57

And then I love Aaron Parnas.

unknown 14:00

Me too.

SPEAKER_02 14:02

Um, but it can be kind of triggering because he's constantly having like breaking news. But yeah, entire systems of governments and organizations around the world are being exposed as fraudulent with rampant, wealthy pedophiles doing horrible shit. And to be clear, I can say confidently that we are on the side of ether rich and let's do it like the French.

SPEAKER_01 14:24

But I I also like this stance of let's get over the Epstein files and let's move on to the Epstein trials. Oh, yeah. Let's move on from the files, go to the trials.

SPEAKER_02 14:33

I I'm tired of hearing about the files. I want heads to roll literally.

SPEAKER_01 14:37

Ah, off with the head.

SPEAKER_02 14:39

Exactly. Heads dance to the file. I also need a glee montage. Heads will roll. Heads will roll.

SPEAKER_01 14:46

Yeah. Hey, Devin, that one was for you.

SPEAKER_02 14:50

Coming back with DJ Christie. Yeah, DJ Christie. Okay, okay. Back to the point. So we're out here. We're out here just writing emails and making dinner again. Again. Every night. If they want dinner every night. Every night. We have to eat. I love it.

unknown 15:06

I love it.

SPEAKER_02 15:06

I love dinner. We've already stopped. Lunch.

SPEAKER_01 15:08

I love dinner.

SPEAKER_02 15:10

But we're just absorbing all of the horrific information that's coming out while simultaneously trying not to get arrested or shot for speaking out against it. And it's almost like we're all that meme of Travolta and Pulp Fiction where he's like, have you seen that one? I know you've seen it. I'm sure. It's a gift when he like is like holding his jacket and he like walks in and he's just like looking around.

SPEAKER_01 15:31

What's going on?

SPEAKER_02 15:31

Yeah. Oh, okay. So, anyways, we were talking about um this at work, and our boss said something that stuck with me, and I cannot get it out of my brain. So, naturally, I'm involving all of you in this in this, and you're welcome. Okay. Right away. He said, and I quote, we all died during COVID and this is hell. Sit with that for a minute. We all died during COVID and this is hell.

SPEAKER_01 15:58

This is the bad place. Is that what you were gonna say next?

SPEAKER_02 16:03

No, I was gonna say not yet. Okay. Um, and listen, I'm not a religious girly by any means. We already established this in previous episodes. I don't necessarily believe in hell, but in the words of Kristen Bell, and as you just said, sorry is the bad place. Yeah. Or at least it sure does feel like it lately.

SPEAKER_01 16:23

Christy watches a lot of TV, but that was a good show. It was so good.

SPEAKER_02 16:26

Yeah. It was really good.

SPEAKER_01 16:27

It was a good commentary on uh all of that. I wonder hold on. What year did that come out? The good place. 2016.

SPEAKER_02 16:36

Well, I say at least it sure does feel like it lately, since roughly 2019, maybe more like 2016, if you know you know. So, okay. So, of course, I decided to bring you evidence of our departure and what we should do about it. Okay. If we even can do anything about it. But before that, if this is hell, we are entitled to smoke breaks. Yes, I've been saying that. So for me, those of you who are not watching on YouTube, hi YouTube. Um, I for Valentine's Day got Christy some bubble cigarettes. Bubble arrow, if you will. But because this is millennial purgatory and I care about our health, they are bubble cigarettes.

SPEAKER_01 17:18

I'm not gonna smoke. I have goals.

SPEAKER_02 17:22

So to help us cope through this episode, anytime one of us spirals rages or says this is hell, we take a bubble break. Okay, great.

SPEAKER_01 17:31

Yes. I just want to point out that um for a long time now I've been like, oh, we need to take like a smoke break. Because I saw a video one time of someone just being like smoke breaks really are therapeutic, and I mean, not necessarily again, I don't smoke and I wouldn't smoke, but um like it's not it's just the gesture and it's also just like that deep breathing. So we just need to take a deep breath. And um I have this really cute group of of galleys, and we like oftentimes send pictures of our smoke breaks, and it's like a tootsie roll or a pen and or chopstick, whatever. But it's just like, yeah, it's like our smoke break. It is after a long week, you know. That's what the text is is like after a long week, I really need this. This one really takes the edge off. Yeah. Or it dwakes. Well, sometimes it's like those, you know, the long skinny Tootsies. Yeah. Or the the short fatties. Yeah. Or like a Twizzler. Oof, Twizzler. Yeah. Anything really else do we like to smoke? Um pens aren't that fun anymore.

SPEAKER_02 18:33

Pens aren't fun anymore.

SPEAKER_01 18:34

Sometimes I like to smoke a diet coke.

SPEAKER_02 18:36

One time I smoked my dog or her little ear. It was just like, I was like, this is just to take the edge off. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_01 18:42

I like it. Anyways, we're not condoning smoking, but we are condoning the action of deep breathing.

SPEAKER_02 18:49

Yes. And we'll get into that a little bit more. But the rules are here: anytime one of us spirals, rages, or says this is hell, we take a bubble break. So let's get into the evidence. Real or not real, nobody knows. Nobody knows.

SPEAKER_01 19:03

Truly.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

Okay, so number one. Okay. Evidence to why we are dead, and this is hell. Timeline weirdness. I will say it once and I will say it again. Time is not real.

SPEAKER_01 19:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:14

It kind of makes you feel better to say time is not real.

SPEAKER_02 19:16

Yeah. It makes me feel better about being late to things, which everybody who knows me should just know that that's that's just who I am now. If you want me to be somewhere at a certain time, tell me 15 to 20 minutes earlier than you need me to be there.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

Yeah. That's a life hack coming from Ashley. My cute mom, she sets her car time ahead. Oh. But not like 15 minutes, not 10 minutes. It's like an unhinged number. It's like 23 minutes or something. Oh. But then the problem is then she learns that she said it ahead. That she said it ahead, so she knows.

SPEAKER_02 19:52

Oh, I still got 23 minutes. Yeah, exactly. And 45 seconds. Okay, so this started for some people during COVID lockdowns. We all lived in our PJs, made bread, scrolled TikTok, and drank too much.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

And yeah. Yeah. My favorite of Did I say it in a recent podcast of eating all the breads, getting all fat and sassy?

SPEAKER_02 20:13

Getting all fat and sassy. Exactly. But time passed slowly, and then somehow now it's 2026, and that was six years ago. So how? How did it feels like 2020 lasted 10 10 business years and 2021 through 2025 happened in like 15 minutes? Like it just went by so fast. It feels like time is moving both too fast and too slow. Am I being dramatic? Probably.

SPEAKER_01 20:38

Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_02 20:39

But is this hell?

SPEAKER_01 20:41

Yes. Yes. Okay. So we'll take a bubble arrow break. Good luck. Oh mine's not working. You gotta do it. Like you gotta dab in there one more time.

SPEAKER_00 20:51

Dippy dip.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

There you go.

SPEAKER_02 20:54

Oh, cute.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

That's very cute. Get yourself a bubble arrow. You'll just feel better.

SPEAKER_02 20:59

This is not sponsored, but maybe. One day. Bubble arrow, hit us up. Um, okay, so reboots of reboots. So again, evidence of hell. A few of my favorite shows and shows from like way back are being rebooted. Scrubs, for instance, I believe it comes out in six days. The reboot.

SPEAKER_01 21:18

Is it all the same people? All the same people. No way. Rebooted comes out soon. What's the main character's name? JD. He hasn't been in anything. He has. They'll just so he hasn't been in anything.

SPEAKER_02 21:31

He actually was in one where he had a podcast. You know what? It's fine. We'll we won't talk about his failures, but he has been in things for sure. Okay. Um, especially T-Mobile commercials. He's really crushing it there.

SPEAKER_01 21:45

Where are you watching a commercial? I haven't seen a commercial in like well, I saw commercials on the Super Bowl and then we're where else are you watching commercials?

SPEAKER_02 21:54

I don't know. On things. Commercials are dead. Well, we were watching football all the time. We would watch commercials. That's basically what football is built for is commercials. Um and then the office with the with the paper. I mean, it's not a complete reboot, but the paper is based off of the office.

SPEAKER_01 22:08

Yeah, we haven't watched that one yet.

SPEAKER_02 22:10

And it just got rebooted too. So it's like we're in a loop in the simulation because we did. And we can't come up with new ideas because we don't have the cloud storage space, so we're just kind of regenerating things. Things.

SPEAKER_01 22:21

No, it's not that we don't have the cloud storage space. It's literally that humans are better at creating things, like the robots don't know how to recreate things. So AI, you ain't all that.

SPEAKER_02 22:31

Yeah. We have lost the plot. And why? Because this is help.

SPEAKER_00 22:36

Okay. Dab.

SPEAKER_02 22:40

I'm really, really bad at this bubble break thing. That's okay.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

Oh, that was a good one. Hey, watch us on YouTube so you can see the fun we're having. And also just to like see our cute studio.

SPEAKER_02 22:52

Yeah, it's really fun.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

Okay. Look at that one.

SPEAKER_02 22:56

Oh, that was cool. Um okay. Next point of evidence, number three. Point of evidence, exhibit number three, if you will. Okay, exhibit number three. Everything requires a subscription and or an app.

unknown 23:10

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 23:11

Everything. Do you want to know?

SPEAKER_01 23:13

I hate it. The worst one? Always. Fly high. Fly high. The trampoline park. Oh. Every time I have to fill out a waiver for fly high, which is only one time a year per child, I have to reset my password. Because this the password I save doesn't work every time to the point where I'm like, you know what? You're not going to fly high this week.

SPEAKER_02 23:38

No. Go jump on your trampoline that you already have. Yeah. Seriously though, I hate it. An example of this that I just gave your husband shade about is fast food restaurants asking if you have the app when you go to order. And just to be clear, I should not need to download an app to buy a damn burger. We are in hell.

unknown 23:59

Okay. Thanks one.

SPEAKER_02 24:01

And while we are talking about apps, well, I guess I'll take my bubble break first.

SPEAKER_01 24:05

Take your bubble break. Because I'm clearly enraged here. I did it. I don't, yeah. I don't mind the app to order.

SPEAKER_02 24:15

I mean only why though? If you have to get if if the only way to get it cheaper at a literal fast food restaurant that for a long time had a dollar menu, which is no longer a dollar menu, by the way. Dollar 25. Um is to download the app and use your points.

SPEAKER_01 24:30

That's that's not yeah, that's not okay. So I'll tell you when it was nice to use that fast food app today. So today I went to Mom Run Club. Shout out to Mom Run Club. Yeah, yeah. Love that. Um, and on the way home, like after running, like, there's nothing better than a DC. It was so good. So I needed it. So I had called my spouse and said, I'm gonna get a uh a doctor uh Diet Coke. Do you want anything? And he was like, Yes. And then I said, Do you want to get the kids anything? And he said, No, they've already had soda today. And I was like, Okay, whatever. And then my daughter calls me and she's like, Are you going to McDonald's? And I said, Yeah, what do you want? And she's like, fries. Yeah. And then I could hear my husband in the background, and he was like, Oh, fine, get me a get me a burger. And then it turned into like, get me this, get me that. And I'm driving, and then I just said, you know what? Put it, put the order in, and then just send me the code. And so we did it. And so I got my dad cook and it was nice. And I I didn't have to talk to anybody.

SPEAKER_02 25:32

Yeah.

unknown 25:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

Are we using apps so we don't have to talk to anybody?

SPEAKER_02 25:38

Probably. And I understand it as like a sort of introvert, extroverted introvert.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:44

But like, why?

SPEAKER_01 25:46

Yeah, it just it bothers me when I have to like pretty soon these apps are gonna be requiring like multi-factor authentication.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Then while we're talking about apps, let's talk about every single app. So point number four, every single app becoming the same exact app. So for example, Snapchat had stories for a long time. Snapchat was just it, it was the only platform that had stories, and it made sense because your messages disappeared. Yeah. And so you put it on your story if you wanted it to stay for longer and for more people to see it. And then Instagram got jelly, and then freaking Facebook bought Instagram. So now all of these platforms, including TikTok now, has stories.

SPEAKER_01 26:22

Yeah. Oh, I don't ever I don't know what the stories are on TikTok.

SPEAKER_02 26:27

They're the same thing, they're just videos posted on it's just it's the same thing.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

TikTok already is stories. What are you talking about?

SPEAKER_02 26:35

So then again, like TikTok came around, and now all of a sudden all these apps have these short platform videos of shorts on YouTube or Instagram reels. Instagram reels are trash. They're those read boots of TikTok. Be an adult and go to TikTok. Get over yourselves. Freaking purists. You're not cooler because you're anyway.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

Yeah. But also, like, oh, I need to stop wasting my time on TikTok. So listen though. I am in hell when I when I spiral on there. Okay. Yeah, let's take a let's take a bubbler. There we go. I like that. They can probably hear every time I blow into it.

SPEAKER_02 27:15

What's not fun about that? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:17

We're safe smoking.

SPEAKER_02 27:18

I'm freaking making a mess over here.

SPEAKER_01 27:21

Okay. That's on my computer.

SPEAKER_02 27:24

No, just on your table over here. Um, so then Twitter. So Twitter used to have, and I'm not gonna call it the other thing because that's stupid. Yeah, get it, get a life. It's Twitter. It'll always be Twitter. I never had one because it's also stupid. It's a toxic place. Yeah. But the verified feature being introduced on other platforms. So I don't know if you know this, but Instagram now has a verified feature, and all these other platforms have verified features. But instead of using um like evidence to see if you're real, you can pay. You can be in a subscription model, I might add. Um, instead of the platform just requiring evidence that you're real. So again, none of this is real. It's all a sham. We dead, we in hell.

SPEAKER_01 28:10

But also, it's because Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg were like, verify me. And everybody's like, You're not cool enough. And then we're like, ugh, we'll just make our own verification system.

unknown 28:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:22

Because they're losers. They are losers. I'm sorry, there's people underneath them making good choices. They dumb. They're losers.

SPEAKER_02 28:29

Such losers. Um, and just as a side tangent while you get your bubbler to work, full shade to all these platforms for not having any originality. Like, get it together, y'all. It is a giant circle jerk of ugly, boring ass billionaires stealing each other's ideas to turn around and then steal all of our data and exploit us. We're the we're the product. We are the product, including fast food restaurants. You're buying the product, yeah, but then they're also collecting your data. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

Think about that next time you I don't have any fast food apps. My spouse does. So because I can't get logged in.

SPEAKER_02 29:13

So listen, we are subscribing to life. Point number five. As a collective, we no longer own things when we buy them. Instead, we are just renting them. And why is this? Because we're in hell. Oh, yep. Every time there's a small pause on the podcast, people are gonna be like, what the hell is going on? Go to YouTube and find out what we're doing. Um, but we don't have because because I but what I just said, we don't have the ability to create new things. We're just reusing old ideas to make them seem new. And we're being exploited now because these companies not only have your money from the item you purchase, like I just mentioned, but they also have your data and they sell that data to uh data brokers for more money. So they're now they're profiting in both ways. They're getting you to subscribe, but they're saying it's free so that they can then mine your data and sell it. Yeah, it's really yucky. Again, H E L Love Double hockey sticks.

SPEAKER_01 30:13

Go back 30 minutes from now.

SPEAKER_02 30:17

And then another annoying thing about social media, point number six, brands pretending to be your friend in the comments of viral videos. What is that about?

SPEAKER_00 30:28

What do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 30:29

So, like, you'll see a funny viral video and you'll see human comments, and then all of a sudden it'll switch, and you'll see all these like brands, like tissue companies or dishwasher companies or whatever, these little Gen Z interns that are managing all these TikTok pages are commenting on all these things because all of a sudden the brand wants to be relevant and this is a viral video. So we're gonna get views and free marketing and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And as someone who runs social media, I get it and I do it because that's how you play the game. But you're a little guy. But like, please, for for the love of all that is everything, stop doing this. Stop it. Get out of here. Yeah. The comment section is not for your corporate marketing. And again, sorry to the Gen Z interns that are running these pages because it's not their choices. Like, tell them it's not a good idea, Gen Z. Yeah, yeah. And I beg of you, ain't nobody trying to be friends with a company while they actively lobby against our rights and endorse orange trash, pedo shitler. Yeah. Oh, why can't companies just be companies and social media be just social media for humans?

SPEAKER_01 31:37

Yeah, I do I do really miss seeing my friends on social media. Yeah. It's like Instagram is straight up trash. Yeah. Except for that Two Brains One Bot account. That was real good. That one's hopping. That one's hopping, but all the other ones are trash.

SPEAKER_02 31:54

And why is this? Because we're in hell.

SPEAKER_01 31:56

We're in hell. It's all a commercial. I claimed I hadn't seen a commercial in years, but I apparently see them all the time.

SPEAKER_02 32:05

Yeah, every day.

SPEAKER_01 32:06

That didn't work.

SPEAKER_02 32:07

Oh, this is so fun.

SPEAKER_01 32:13

We're gonna start a fire. Just kidding. There's no there's no fire.

SPEAKER_02 32:17

So, and then uh the algorithm knows too much. But like, I have a very serious question.

unknown 32:23

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

What even is the algorithm that everybody's talking about? Like, everybody talks about it like, oh, the algorithm, the algorithm. Nobody knows what it is. Nobody knows. Like, what is it?

SPEAKER_01 32:35

I think there's a couple people that know.

SPEAKER_02 32:36

Um, explain it to me. You can't, because nobody fucking knows.

SPEAKER_01 32:41

Nobody knows. Right? I mean, I one time look at something on accident, and then like my yeah, like I one time looked at magnetic lashes on TikTok, and now that's all my TikTok is is mad magnetic lashes. Yeah. I just I don't want to wear mascara. Yeah, but I don't want to look like a boy. You don't look like a boy. So now I I haven't worn mascara in probably about a year. Yeah. And now I've started putting it on. Oh, why? Because I saw a picture of me and I look like a boy.

SPEAKER_02 33:14

Here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna get an eyelash curler if you don't already have one. Okay, and you're gonna get clear like mascara that's not like because I'm assuming you don't like the black because it is like clumpy and it hurts. Yeah. Just use your normal lashes. Oh, that's a good one. Or go get a lash lift. I have a great lash eyebrow girl.

SPEAKER_01 33:33

I'm cheap.

SPEAKER_02 33:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:35

Sorry. You gotta do what you gotta do. But that was what an algorithm is is seeing something that you like and then propagating it. Nobody knows what an algorithm is. No algorithm. Christy, just leave.

SPEAKER_02 33:49

No, I want you here. Who else am I gonna yell at? Final point is AI is taking over. And I don't mean this in like a literal sense because AI ain't shit. But you can't do anything without someone shoving AI down your throat. Yeah. At work, at freaking commercials, Super Bowl commercials, everywhere. You I can't order my freaking meds on the pharmacy because I don't exist, apparently, according to AI.

SPEAKER_01 34:13

But you do exist, but you don't exist. But I don't exist.

SPEAKER_02 34:15

I mean, and I recognize the irony of that as we are a podcast that uses AI as like a springboard for ideas, but that doesn't necessarily mean it needs to replace like actual human interactions or actual human beings.

SPEAKER_01 34:27

No, that and that's the point is AI should not be replacing humans, it just aids us. It's another little it's like our little assistant. It's like the little paper clip and word, like Clippy! You spelled it wrong, girl. For the tenth time, you don't know how to spell guarantee. I still don't know.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

I still don't know how to spell guarantee. Does anyone? No, nobody knows.

SPEAKER_01 34:51

If if my life were on the line to spell guarantee, goodbye. We did. We did. Why? Because we're in hell.

unknown 34:58

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 35:00

But that's what I mean, is like I think AI has a very good it it has a purpose in life, but it shouldn't be replacing actual skills. It shouldn't be because because it might work the first time, but then after that it just gets sloppy. Yeah. Or it just So stop believing all these AI bros that are like AI's gonna be running your dishwasher.

SPEAKER_02 35:25

Speaking of, this is a complete tangent, but there is a video that I was gonna send you of a um AI robot maid or whatever. And they were like showing it or whatever. And then come to find out at the end. No, they come to find out at the end, it's somebody in another room doing like the virtual movements. Of course it is Theranos.

SPEAKER_01 35:46

You guys are falling for Theranos again.

SPEAKER_02 35:51

So funny. And then another one they tried to do a presentation.

SPEAKER_01 35:56

Cigarette didn't work.

SPEAKER_02 35:58

They tried to do a presentation where um they like showed this AI robot that they were gonna like have be like your AI butler, and they bring it out, and it's like in front of like an audience of people, and immediately it just falls over.

unknown 36:14

So funny.

SPEAKER_01 36:15

I swear to you, it is these people, they're selling you Theranos. Yeah, you cannot run every lab test on one drop of blood, Elizabeth Holmes. Yeah. Full shade to Matmy.

SPEAKER_02 36:25

Yeah, full shade to that lady. You can't because you're in prison. Also in prison. Yeah. Okay. Probably like fancy prison.

SPEAKER_01 36:31

She's in fancy prison. She's at she's at home.

SPEAKER_02 36:33

Yeah. Um I'm gonna look up where she's gonna be. But also full shade to everybody that bought into that and didn't listen to scientists when they brought things forward to say. Like full shade to people who just generally don't listen to scientists because we know what we're talking about. Okay, just let us just let us just let us do the things.

SPEAKER_01 36:53

Yeah, so it says that Elizabeth Holmes is serving an 11-year sentence at federal prison camp in Bryan, Texas. Is that summer camp? What's up? They're making friendship bracelets. I don't know, Texas. It's a minimum security federal prison camp in Texas.

SPEAKER_02 37:11

She's probably hanging out with that dumb bitch playing with puppies.

SPEAKER_01 37:17

She reportedly works as a clerk helping other inmates, earns 31 cents per hour and attends therapy.

SPEAKER_02 37:30

Woof. I need a cigarette.

SPEAKER_01 37:36

I just think you can't replicate the goodness of these of these humans. Um AI wants everything done in one way, in one fashion. And it's like, what makes us humans is all the intricacies and all the differences and all the you know, like life experience that we bring to the table that everybody is doing it unique. And you might look at somebody and say, Yeah, I wouldn't dye my hair that color, or I wouldn't, you know, whatever, but like that person is serving a purpose with their cool hair, or then I'm serving a purpose with my uh gorgeous hair, air-dried hair right now that is unruly. Yeah, and it's just like AI is not gonna be able to replicate that. They're just gonna try and create one model, and one model can't do all the cool things that we need. Yeah, exactly. And as we said before, AI can absolutely help me become a better writer. I am not a good writer, but AI has helped me like take your ideas and go further. Take my ideas and go further, take my take my, you know, word soup and turn it into something that somebody else can actually read. Like, that's what AI is good at. But AI is not gonna replace people.

SPEAKER_02 38:55

Yeah, I agree. Get alive. And we've said before, AI is just conversational Google.

SPEAKER_01 39:00

Yeah. And to be clear, we've always had AI, but now it's just it's just talking to you now.

SPEAKER_02 39:06

And the thing that's different, I think, that people don't realize is AI is only polling for what we've given it. Like it's not some ethereal being that has like, you know. It can only evolve as much as we do.

SPEAKER_01 39:20

And so once we stop evolving, it will stop evolving, and then we're all gonna be like trash cans.

SPEAKER_02 39:25

Yeah. Have you ever seen the movie Idiocracy? I think about that a lot. It's a good one. You should watch it. Um, okay, so I'll joke. We just spiral. We sure did, but at least we had a couple bubble cigs while we were at it. Um, jokes aside, why does it feel like something shifted? And I'm gonna tell you, it's trauma. But like trauma, hell, potato tomato, you know.

SPEAKER_01 39:53

Potato tomato is not the phrase, but I like it. Potato banana, what can I say?

SPEAKER_02 40:00

Potato tomato. So, as a collective, over the last few years, we've experienced an insane amount of trauma in a short amount of time. And not to state the obvious, but we are still going through it. Yeah. Um, so when we're talking about how we process trauma, like our how our brains process trauma, we look at three different parts of the brain. The first is the amygdala, which is essentially our alarm system and emotional meter. This little buddy goes into overdrive when we face traumatic situations, especially because humans are generally empathetic pack animals. I know this isn't like groundbreaking information, but yes, we all do have empathy. We all have the ability to be empathetic. Um, and regardless of what the greater world would have you believe right now, we do care about one another. And when events happen where our pack is at risk, emotion gets involved. And when emotion is involved, those events hit harder and can be harder for our brains to come out of it. So that's your amygdala, it processes your emotion, it's your alarm system. The second is the hippocampus. Um, this friend is our time organizer. It puts our memories in chronological order, and it reminds me a lot of that movie um Harry Potter. Oh, okay. Inside Out. Oh, okay. Yeah, with the balls. Yeah, yeah. So emotional balls. Yeah, they have like the little, they look like little marbles, but they're like in the movie, they're like going through this like maze, and it's it's like their little the little memories are on a shelf. So this is like if somebody knocked that shelf over, like the trauma And then they spill. The trauma knocked that shelf over, and everything is just all over the place, and the person putting them back is just doing their best.

SPEAKER_01 41:39

They're just not even as quickly as possible, throwing them on the shelves.

SPEAKER_02 41:42

Exactly. And then the third thing, yeah, exactly. And then the third part of our brain um is the prefrontal cortex. Um, it handles our rational thinking, logic, and reasoning. And during high stress, she takes a nap. She gone. Which evolutionarily speaking, um, that sort of makes sense because you can't reason your way out of a bear bear attack. You just gotta run faster than your friend. Yeah. Get out of there. I just need to be faster. You're not having a conversation with the bear about whether or not it's gonna attack you, you're just getting out of there. Um but really, though, our prefrontal cortex just checks out and lets the rest of the brain deal with the situation, which honestly, sleigh queen. But honestly, like this is why people who are stressed just do dumb shit. When like you look back at it and you're like, why did you do that? I do that all the time to myself.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

Because I'm stressed.

SPEAKER_02 42:39

Because I'm stressed. So when traumatic things happen, like literally hourly at this point in 2026, in February 22nd of 2026, your cortisol increases and your adrenaline spikes, and the body shifts into survival mode. But trauma and high stress situations aren't supposed to be happening constantly in our lives like we are right now, and every day should not be feeling like you're being chased by a bear. Um, our brains are just not designed to live in a constant state of survival mode. So also look at those things that are creating that and cut them off. Yes, exactly. So when it does happen frequently, we just don't ever come out of it. And we just we we didn't just go through a couple like bad events over like spread across a couple years. We have been going through and continue to go through prolonged nervous system activation. And the amygdala is tired of being CC'd on every global crisis. The brain in general is just like, y'all guys, leave me alone. Yeah, stop replying all.

SPEAKER_01 43:47

You know how I feel about a reply-all.

SPEAKER_02 43:50

I actually prefer a reply all if I'm supposed to be kept in the loop, do it. But if you're replying all on a mass email that's like you're not supposed to be included, don't do it.

SPEAKER_01 44:03

I am of the impression, like, if I need to be included on it, then just send it to me. Why is there a whole group?

SPEAKER_00 44:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:12

I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I think there's a time and place, but lately I've been CC'd on a lot of things, and I'm like, you know what? I'm deactivating this account.

SPEAKER_02 44:21

But also, what's really fun is just being able to archive and not having to do anything about it. That's my favorite thing. I'm tired of archiving. Oh, really? Select, select, select, archive.

unknown 44:30

Ugh.

SPEAKER_02 44:32

So what if this isn't hell? Maybe the we died theory isn't about death in a literal sense. Maybe it's about death of our reality. The grieving of who we were or who we thought we were. And maybe we're just experiencing collective grief from systems unraveling and changing our reality.

SPEAKER_00 44:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:50

Everything we thought our systems were, and the men we've entrusted to run our governments are the same five billionaire men who look like they moisturize with printer toner. As many of our creators have pointed out, this could be an extinction burst. This could be like the last struggle of the old to stay relevant while the rest of the world decides we aren't going to do this anymore. Maybe we reframe this and think of it as if we're experiencing growing pains. Anytime we level up, we gotta pass the boss level first. We've talked about this with Saturn and um my astrology and Mario. Mario Kart. Yeah. But it's like spring cleaning on like a grand scale for all of us. When you clean and organize, um, you gotta pull everything out of the closet.

SPEAKER_01 45:36

You gotta pull it all out. You have to pull it out, look at it all, and yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:40

You gotta pull all the clutter and mess out and go through it. You gotta decide what's no longer working and needs to go and what needs to be dusted off and put back. Um, and so to you and to our listeners, hear me when I say this. You aren't crazy. Your nervous system is just tired.

SPEAKER_01 45:58

Yeah. Which again, and I know we've said this in other episodes, we all need to just go back to a simpler time and smaller connections, smaller group connections. Like the internet is dead, you guys. She did. Like, look up how to tell if something is likely a bot and stop responding to it. Stop doing all those things, but get back to those small connections, get back to real life events, get back to reading a damn book.

SPEAKER_02 46:23

Yes, keep libraries alive. Please keep libraries alive.

SPEAKER_01 46:26

Please, I'm reading a really good book right now.

SPEAKER_02 46:29

I love I love it. Tell me your book, Rick.

SPEAKER_01 46:31

It is Theo of Golden. Okay. Recommended by my friend Meg Brown. Hey from uh Justifying the F word. Yeah, Justifying the F word. Anyways, it is about um this man that moves to a new city and his interesting way of meeting people, and it is beautiful, and it is oh, it is beautiful.

SPEAKER_02 46:51

Jeez, I love that.

SPEAKER_01 46:52

So it just, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 46:54

I have one that I've been wanting to read. It's in my, it's in my like lineup. Is it Harry Potter? No, I've already get out of here with your Harry Potter. I've read about the earth. Shut up about Lingardian Liviosa. I mean no. You can do a bubbler, do it. I'll do a bubbler. Well, I tell you about this book that I want to read. I've had it sitting there. I I really can't wait to read it, but I just haven't had the time. Um, it's called Eat Slay Love.

SPEAKER_01 47:25

Oh, hey.

SPEAKER_02 47:26

Oh, yeah. It's about these three women that meet and they had all been dating the same guy and they end up deciding to murder him.

SPEAKER_01 47:34

Oh, eat slay love.

SPEAKER_02 47:35

Yeah. Um I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 47:38

I don't it could, it should be. It's like one of those ones that it's like the author actually, this is a true story, but we're we're pretending it's no, she could.

SPEAKER_02 47:46

We're pfft. That's why I'm not gonna tell you who the author is, but also because I can't remember.

SPEAKER_01 47:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:50

Um, I can't wait to read it. I'll tell you how it is, let you know how it goes. But how are we gonna how are we gonna read this book?

SPEAKER_01 47:56

We gotta put the got to put the dead internet down.

SPEAKER_02 47:58

Yeah, I I don't know. But I'm gonna tell you right now, I love my local library. I take my kids there all the time. Good. And also, they have amazing resources that I didn't even realize that they had. Like they have podcasting stuff there, they have machines where you can make little like buttons for things. Like cute, like vote like you know, they have an embroidery machine, they have all sorts of amazing things that like if you want to go have a hobby, go to your library.

SPEAKER_01 48:29

Get it figured out.

SPEAKER_02 48:30

Do it. Let's all just get a new hobby. Just go to the library. They have free yoga classes, they have free citizenship classes, they have free um, oh, what else? Books like books. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that part.

SPEAKER_01 48:43

They have free books. Just kidding.

SPEAKER_02 48:45

They also have DVDs, yeah. They have tapes you can listen to, they they have all sorts of stuff. It's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 48:52

They do audiobooks, they do ebooks.

SPEAKER_02 48:54

They do ebooks. Check out Libby. Libby is uh is an audiobook app through your local library, and there's another one. If you're in like a in your local area, you can also look at your own local like our local library has its own app too. Oh for books, besides Libby. But anyways, okay, so your nervous system is tired, she needs to come back to safety, she needs a snack, she needs a sandwich, and she needs a nap. And a good book, apparently. Yeah, a good book. And some cozy slips. So on that note, let's talk about nervous system spot A because you're not in hell, you're just overstimulated, babes. You're just in, yeah. So listen, if this isn't hell and it's just prolonged uh nervous system activation, then we need to stop acting like warriors trying to solve the world's problems and start acting like toddlers. And girl, I got the lowdown on toddler vibes.

SPEAKER_01 49:49

Okay, yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_02 49:50

You're in it. I'm technically a resident expert at this point in my life, which I would just like to say that.

SPEAKER_01 49:56

Yep. Come to ask you with all your toddler problems.

SPEAKER_02 49:59

So, this is what we're gonna do. This is what we're all gonna do. Okay. After we go to the library. First, we aren't coloring and putting stickers on enough things. We need to get back to our scribbling and glue-eating vibes.

SPEAKER_01 50:12

Yes. We're cutting paper, we're making a mess.

SPEAKER_02 50:15

We're making a get the glitter glue out. There's nothing that warms your heart like glitter glue.

SPEAKER_01 50:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:21

Yeah. Um, truly, crafting, even if it's unhinged, does something to the soul and it calms you. Making something with your hands that can you can say, I did that, put it on the fridge, it's mine. Case closed. Case closed. Second, we need snacks and water. Always. You cannot dismantle the patriarchy while hypoglycemic and dehydrated. Yeah, put a little salt in that water. Yeah. A little shaker. Get you a little bit of that liquid IV or like uh what's the other one? Or just drink salty water.

SPEAKER_01 50:52

Relay. I like relay.

SPEAKER_02 50:55

Third, nature.

SPEAKER_01 50:59

Touch grass.

SPEAKER_02 51:00

Nature, nature, nature. Kids and human in general are basically just complex plants. Um we need the sun, we need the water, we need to lay in the grass, we need to pet something with a pulse, and we need to absorb the literal vitamin D because we love the D. Um always. But you know, wear sunscreen.

SPEAKER_00 51:21

Always.

SPEAKER_02 51:21

Don't get you, don't get you that that skin cancer anything good for you.

SPEAKER_01 51:25

No, always wear sunscreen. But like just do that fake tan, that but like a good one. Like, don't do like a fake, like, so you look orange like somebody we all know.

SPEAKER_02 51:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:34

Do your tan Tuesdays and like yeah, live your life. Bathe in that bathe in that coconutty smell.

SPEAKER_02 51:40

But really, like getting your hands into the earth or like touching the grass, or even like I know it's wintertime. It's called grounding. Yeah, it is called grounding. And even though it's wintertime right now, even making a snowball and chucking it at something can make you feel so much better. Yeah, you're reconnecting with the earth. It's not some weird witchy-woo-woo thing. It's more like, hey, everything has a vibe as we've previously established. Get yours back to where it needs to be.

SPEAKER_00 52:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:05

And it's not on crazy social media stuff. Anything to add?

SPEAKER_01 52:09

Yeah, I need to like throw my phone away. I should just go back to a flip phone. I can't wait. I'm going back to a flip phone. I want to the only game I want to play on my phone is that snake game.

SPEAKER_02 52:19

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:20

Or Tetris. I never had Tetris on my little Motorola.

SPEAKER_02 52:24

I didn't have a flip phone, I had a block phone at one point and it had Tetris.

SPEAKER_01 52:27

So um I really, I really need to do better at just shutting down the phone.

SPEAKER_02 52:33

Same. Um, number four, move and breathe. Get your body moving and out of that bad, like get out of that. First thing in the morning.

SPEAKER_01 52:42

Yep. First thing in the morning, if you do not get up and just move around, like then all that sludge that's just laid in there all day, aka your blood and that blood sludge fluids, your your cell fluids, them sludges, them sludges are just not working, they're not flushing through anything, and you are not firing on any cylinders. Just get up and like five minute walk.

SPEAKER_02 53:04

Yeah, drink a little bit of water, like get things moving again and breathe. Like, but but like breathe like you mean it. Like yeah, like aggressive, like aggressive breathing. Take a bubble smoke break.

SPEAKER_01 53:16

Have you heard like just recharging with the sun in the morning? Like just going outside and like letting the sun penetrate your eyeballs.

SPEAKER_02 53:25

Yeah. Excellent use of the word penetrate. I love that eyeball. Oh, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been waiting all day for that. When I can when can I use it? You've been like over there eagerly like, wait, when can I use this work? But meditate. I found meditating last year and it's been amazing. Um, speaking of free things, there's an app called Medito. Um, it's made by I think Dutch scientists. It's free, and there's hundreds of hours of content on there. Oh, and they just go off of donations.

SPEAKER_01 53:57

But it's hard at first. Meditating is very hard at first because you have to be comfortable with the uncomfortable. You have to be comfortable sitting in your silence, sitting in your non-stimulated state. Yeah. And some days you're good at it, and some days you're like, I'm gonna lose my mind. Yeah. And that's growth.

SPEAKER_02 54:13

But they have like I I specifically like this app because they have like a class that builds you up to a certain amount of time. So you start with like one minute.

SPEAKER_01 54:21

Yeah. And then, you know, or like even like 30 seconds or whatever. We're not jumping into a 30-minute meditation when No, you will lose your mind. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 54:29

You will lose your mind. And but like, even if you don't meditate, like at least like sigh dramatically. That helps. Yay. Or hum that stimulates your vagus nerve. That really helps too.

SPEAKER_01 54:40

Like just but don't hum around me. That's annoying.

SPEAKER_02 54:44

Well, you know, like there's some people, like when they meditate, they um oh yeah. That is even just that vibration of like moving it helps, like bring you down, brings you back. I promise it helps. And last, we've we've hit on it a couple times now, but stop doom scrolling, stop watching the news for hours and on repeat and and get silly. Stop telling your brain that you alone will solve the problems and instead give yourself one hour to be informed by your trusted news creators, to spiral at your heart's content, to take your podcast mic off of the table and just hold it like a psychopath.

SPEAKER_01 55:25

My mic just fell off the table. Trying to be real quiet about it, but I am falling apart over here.

SPEAKER_02 55:31

But really, you told that to me once. You said find your top two, three creators, get your news from them, and then be done with and be done.

SPEAKER_01 55:40

Yeah, that's what my sister said. She said, give yourself like five to ten minutes to like spiral and then like literally set a timer and then be done. Catch up. Don't be uninformed. You can't be uninformed, but you don't have to be on high alert 24-7.

SPEAKER_02 55:55

And as your husband wisely told me earlier today, you alone are not going to solve the world's problem.

SPEAKER_01 56:00

How dare he? But yeah, he's true.

SPEAKER_02 56:03

You alone cannot change anything. You need community. Community is what I took from that. So um.

SPEAKER_01 56:10

What did they say in isn't it the Lorax? Like it takes a whole few people to care a whole lot. Here we go.

SPEAKER_02 56:17

Unless someone like you cares an awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not. Oh yeah, I like that. So the Lorax dropping truth bombs over here. Okay, so um, so after you're done spiraling, get off. Turn off notifications and get silly. We need to sing along to more unhinged songs and completely bizarre lyrics. And I'm talking 2016 pen pineapple apple pen vibes or 2012 Gonggum Styles vibes. I don't know what the 2020 is one. What are you saying? Pen pineapple apple pen? What? I have a pen. I have an apple. Uh apple pen.

SPEAKER_01 56:56

Oh no. This is the first time hearing it. I know Gangum. Gangum style, whatever.

SPEAKER_02 57:01

Yeah. We are um gonna listen. I listen, everybody. I'm gonna educate Christy on 2016's pen pineapple apple pen. I have pineapple.

SPEAKER_01 57:09

Are you like doing it?

SPEAKER_02 57:11

No, we will after this pod. Oh, okay. Oh, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 57:14

I thought I was waiting for you to play it.

SPEAKER_02 57:17

No. Sorry. No, we'll watch it after. Okay. Um we need to smoke our bubble cigarettes. Yes. Or winter besties.

SPEAKER_01 57:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 57:26

We need to be kids again. Just put those songs on it in the car and scream. Or in your kitchen. Or in your kitchen. And dance like idiots with your family. It's amazing. We need the silliness, we need to have fun, and we need the weird.

SPEAKER_01 57:40

And like listen to those funny podcaster girls. Like, I think they're like two brains, one bot. They're so funny. And they're not, they're unreal, but they're they know things.

SPEAKER_02 57:50

Sometimes we Google for free. Google. So, yes, the world is burning, and yes, it's hard out there for a pimp, but maybe we can bring s'more.

SPEAKER_01 57:59

Arguably the hardest time it's ever been for a pimp. The hardest time.

SPEAKER_02 58:04

But maybe we can bring s'mores stuff to the fire. So we don't have to stop it from burning. And if we're still here breathing, laughing, making s'mores on the fire of life, and figuring it out together, maybe that's us making the most of this hell. And the scaries can't get us.

SPEAKER_01 58:20

Yeah. We're laughing, the scaries can't get us.

SPEAKER_02 58:22

Exactly. And if this is hell, it's not fire and brimstone. It's just a slight inconvenience forever. But we can handle inconvenience one fridge or bubble sig at a time. Yeah. And speaking of, let's play a game. Okay. Do it, lady. I just made it up earlier today. It is called fridge sig or bubble sig. Oh, okay. So here's what's gonna happen. I'm gonna give you some mildly devastating life scenarios, and you can choose between two options for how to cope. A fridge sig or a bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 58:54

Okay. So I already kind of am nervous about this, but go ahead.

unknown 58:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 58:58

Oh, is there any bad ones? No. They're mildly inconvenient. You're fine. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 59:03

Yeah. So a fridge sig sits like if you choose fridge sig, this means like you're standing in front of an open fridge, you're pounding a diet coke, you're staring off into the void, you're disassociating politely, that kind of stuff. Bubble sig is you're rejecting despair, you're choosing silliness, you're blowing a bubble, and you're spiraling theatrically into like Oblivion. Oblivion, yeah. Um, neither one is good or bad, but those are the two options. Fridge sig, bubble sig, you gotta tell me. No overthinking, gut reaction only. Okay. Ready? I'm ready. Okay, round number one, mild inconveniences.

SPEAKER_01 59:40

Is it my docking station not working? Because that is a real cigarette.

SPEAKER_02 59:46

No.

SPEAKER_01 59:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 59:48

Your password needs one more symbol, number, or special character. Bridge stick bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 59:55

I'm gonna go bubble sig. I just need to laugh about it.

SPEAKER_02 59:57

Yeah. We've already established you and your password are really going through it together. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:04

MFA.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:06

The self-checkout yells at you for literally existing. Bridge stick bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:11

Bridge sig.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:12

All right. Probably like just right there, right? Pull it out of the finger.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:16

I'm not buying this. I have to drink this at the checkout and do your job. Fridge sig, free.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:23

One time we were in a hurry, and my husband thought it was funny to like lean on the we were doing the self-checkout, and he was leaning on the thing, and it kept saying, unexpected item in the bagging area. Oh. I was gonna lose my mind. I kept saying, No, there's not.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:38

And that's when you left him.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:41

And his body's in the backyard. Just kidding, he's alive, dating. Sure, he is. Hold up a newspaper and take a picture real quick. Um, you say, you too, when the waiter says enjoy your meal. Oh fridge sig bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:57

I did that the other day, or I almost did the other day. I was like, ooh, that was a close one.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:01

Ooh, that was a close one. That was almost embarrassing.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:04

Yeah, you loser.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:06

Um you wave back at someone who wasn't waving at you. Fridge sig, bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:11

That's a ooh. I want to laugh it off, but I think I'm in a fridge sight. I think I think so too. My sister and I have this um phrase that we say to each other and we apply it in real life, it's which is don't get involved. So you know, when you're like in a scenario where like you can clearly see somebody is doing something like wrong or like not understanding something, and then you go over and insert yourself into the situation, and they s they still are just like, What are you talking about? Why are you talking to me? And it and then you walk away, leaving like, well, that just made that situation way worse. We say to each other, hey, don't get involved.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:48

Don't get involved. Yeah, I like it.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:50

So someone waving at you and you're not sure, don't get involved.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:54

Don't get involved.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:54

Don't get involved.

unknown 1:01:55

Don't get involved.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:58

Don't wave at people. That's I want a shirt that says don't get involved.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:01

Don't get involved, Christy. Um, okay, round two. Cultural glitches. Okay. Your favorite show gets rebooted badly. Fridge sig, bubble sig. Fridge sig. All right. You'll be mad about it. Yeah, I would probably be mad about it too. Um, a brand comments, we love this on a viral post. Fridge bubbles.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:21

Fridge sig. I'm frustrated. Someone replies all in an email. Oh, real cigarette. Real cigarette. Do not reply all and say, Why am I on this email?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:37

Take me on the month. Or like somebody's retiring or something, and they reply all like bye to everybody. Like we all needed to know 150 times.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:50

Just quit. Just at that point, just quit your job.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:53

Just walk into the ocean already.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:55

See what happens.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:56

Um, an app asks you to subscribe just to use it. You can't even do anything else on the app. You download it, you take the time to download it. Oh, and then you have to literally make an account and subscribe with your dollars to use it.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:10

Times when I get to that subscribe screen, I'm just like, well, I don't even want this, anyways. And so I just exit out. So that one would be a bubble arrow. But if I actually need said product and I then have to subscribe and do all that stuff, then it's a fridge stick. And make a password and give your firstborn child. If I'm just gonna walk away, I'm gonna I'm gonna bubble sig it.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:27

Deal. Um AI gaslights you about Napoleon. Oh my gosh. Which is arguably one of our best episodes. I've got a lot of positive comments about that one. Um bubble sig and a fridge sig.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:40

At the same time. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:41

I'm gonna suck my fridge sig out of the thing with my bubble sig.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:46

It's like off to like this, like a little like off to the side.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:48

Like I'm like, you're just doing that thing that um smokers do where they like hold their beer. Oh, they just put their cigarette like this. That or take a oh, I likey, likey, yeah, yeah. Or they talk with a cigarette in their mouth. That's wild.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:08

And just that cig is bouncing. It's given So these bubble arrow cigarettes that we're these these fake cigs that we're smoking with our bubbles, they are metal and they're kind of heavy.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:17

Yeah, they're not a real I definitely didn't think they were gonna be metal. I don't know why I didn't.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:21

I don't know why they thought it would be plastic. Yeah. I don't know. Kudos for because the case though is definitely plastic.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:28

Yeah, and it's hard to open unless you push the button that says press. Because I was struggling earlier trying to show our friend. Okay, last last four. Okay. This is round three. You're really good at this last end segment, by the way. Existential. It's 2026.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:46

Uh, is that it? Oh, okay. Um real cigarette. Just kidding. Bubble arrow. I'm gonna go with a bubble arrow and a good song.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:55

And a good song and a good funny TikTok.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:57

About them white claws.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:59

Oh, I love it. Yeah. Chicken the show. We should post white claws. We should post that video on our socials.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:06

I posted it in our TikTok story. Oh.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:09

And I reposted it. I literally don't know where TikTok stories are.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:12

They're on the show. We can't go, we can't get into all the things you don't know. I have other talents. You remember something embarrassing from your 2008 social media.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:26

Fridge's sake.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:29

Okay. You realize 2016 was almost a decade ago.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:37

Not almost, it is a decade ago. It's a decade ago. So yeah. Um hurts my feelings. Bubble arrow. Bubble arrow. We gotta find things to laugh about. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:46

That is crazy. And finally, someone says unprecedented times again.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:53

That is a straight um vodka shot. No, it's a straight up whiskey shot. Knuckles to their teeth.

unknown 1:06:00

Dill.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:02

Find a different word. Get at Thesaurus.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:04

Get go to the library and look at a thesaurus.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:07

Outside.

unknown 1:06:08

Go notch grass.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:12

So maybe life isn't hell. Maybe it's just a series of fridge sig or bubble sig moments. And we have to adapt. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. That was awful. So to our listeners, you decide are we in hell or are we just millennials having some minor inconveniences?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:32

Well, we don't want to like single out just millennials. Like I'm sure we have a lot of Gen Z listeners.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:36

No, I just mean us in general. Are we millennials going through it? Yeah. Um, so that's our show. Please remember to regulate and hang in there and breathe like you mean it. Yeah. And dance your ass off and be silly, make some crafts.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:52

And find connection where you can. And yeah, just do it. Do it, lady. And on your birthday. Do all of it all at once.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:59

Oh. And remember to stay human. Stay kind. And curious. Oh, curious. Stay curious. I know this podcast. Remember to stay human. Stay curious. And don't let the robots win.