.png)
Two Brains One Bot
Two girls attempting to survive in the age of rising stupidity & robots. Join us each week as we laugh about life, memes, pop culture, and the dumb shit that AI says. 🧠🧠🤖
Two Brains One Bot
In THIS economy?! (Unhinged Side Hustles Ranked)
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
People are doing WHAT for extra money??
This week we’re ranking the most unhinged side hustles we could find, from surprisingly smart to absolutely not. We’re talking renting out your pool to strangers, being a fake friend for hire, selling feet pics, and even getting paid to cry at funerals.
We also try to guess how much these side hustles actually make… and let’s just say some of them had us questioning our morals a little bit. Some are genius. Some are concerning. Some should probably not exist.
So be honest, at what monthly income are you saying yes??
Love what you hear? Check out the videos on socials:
- https://www.youtube.com/@TwoBrainsOneBot
- https://www.instagram.com/twobrainsonebot/
- https://www.tiktok.com/@twobrainsonebot
We don't know.
SPEAKER_00All right. Welcome back, everybody. My name is Ashley. It's Christy. And this is Two Brains, One Bot. And we're a podcast.
SPEAKER_01We are still a podcast.
SPEAKER_00We're still a podcast.
SPEAKER_01Despite our our best efforts. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I don't know. We're still very underpaid podcasts.
SPEAKER_01And by underpaid, you mean not paid.
SPEAKER_00Not paid. Yeah. Doing this, doing this for the love of the game. Yeah. Um doing this for the listeners. Kate, do you have any updates? Any corrections?
SPEAKER_01Any uh no, but the so we're recording this the day that the what was that episode called? The Beasts.
SPEAKER_00The Beasts. Um, uh the Yeti, Bigfoot, Nessie, oh my.
SPEAKER_01We are recording that day that that came out, and my husband texted and said, You guys should look up sunbears because sunbears look like humans in a bear suit, and it's hilarious. I don't believe that sunbears are real. We'll have to post the picture, but that one of a like the bear from behind with its like saggy butt. I'm like, yeah, that's a human.
SPEAKER_00That's like a that's like a human in a bear costume that showed itself.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Or just it just, you know, like this the stereotypical like male with no butt, but like a big belly.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I know what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_00Um okay, I don't have any updates or anything else. I don't have anything else besides Stunbear. I did want to formally apologize for including your um off camera singing.
SPEAKER_01I'll just be more careful next time. I haven't listened to it yet, so I don't I am not mad at the in the moment because I haven't listened to it yet, but I could be in the future. Yeah. This could be our last recordings. Maybe.
SPEAKER_00I doubt it. But maybe. You'll get me again. You'll get me on one of them.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Bills. What song was it? You can't always get away. That's a banger. Yeah, that's a good one. Okay. Okay. So, you know how we're always joking that like literally doing anything in this economy is trash? Yeah. Like in Trump's economy. No, thank you. No. No, trash. Um, I was thinking about it the other day because I was getting real down about life, and I was like, man, I need a side hustle.
SPEAKER_01Okay. And is this not your side hustle? This is my side hustle, but it doesn't this is this pays like shit.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it's it's costing me money to be here. Yeah. Uh podcasting is not free. No, podcasting is not free.
SPEAKER_01Um, but we're as close to free as possible, though. I always think about a side hustle, and then I'm always like, oh, but then I'll have to do it. That's true. That's the worst part of it.
SPEAKER_00Well, I've got some ideas for you today. So today we're gonna dive into the most unhinged side hustles that people are actually doing for money.
SPEAKER_01Um, not really Does it start with own and end with my kids listen? Okay, go ahead. Cut that part.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so we're not necessarily gonna be covering these to judge, but like also we're gonna be judging for sure. Um polite judging. But like maybe like we're just considering side hustles for ourselves, unless somebody wants us to wants to pay us to do podcasting. And you know, we're maybe gonna consider some of these for ourselves.
SPEAKER_01Ooh, I can't wait.
SPEAKER_00Because it's hard out here for a pimp.
SPEAKER_01Help. It's arguably the hardest time it's ever been out here for a pimp is the line. Yeah. Um, but yeah, help us pick our new side hustle.
SPEAKER_00Yes. And also, or in addition to maybe just like listen so we can be paid to do this. Because we're having a great time. Yeah, it's a good time. Okay, but because of who I am, we're gonna do this in like a game style because it makes it a little less sad. Um, so this is how it's gonna go. I'm gonna read the side hustle, and your task is to guess how much it pays, and then together we're gonna rate um, yes, I would do it tomorrow, maybe depends on how broke I am, and no stretch of gel. Okay.
unknownOoh.
SPEAKER_00And we're gonna start off like with some reasonable ones, and then we're gonna get unhinged with it, mainly so that I know that your kids have fallen asleep before the sketchy ones appear. That's a great idea. And today we're going to learn at what price do my morals disappear? Oh, so here's the first couple that are pretty low chaos, surprisingly reasonable, and might actually be a valid thing to people. So, number one, renting out your pool. So you can apparently rent out your pool or your backyard for parties, events, swimming lessons, weddings, etc.
SPEAKER_01Do I have to have a pool to rent out my backyard? Because I have a large backyard.
SPEAKER_00Not necessarily. No. Okay. I'll look into it. So tell me how much you think you could make from doing this.
SPEAKER_01Okay, so let's just assume I have a pool. Okay. Where am I located? Where are you here? Okay, so this is in you in Utah? Yeah. Okay. I don't know, man. Everything is yeah, okay. I don't know. I don't know, yeah. Okay. I am located here. I didn't look at this. I'm gonna say, like, I have a pool. My sister has a beautiful pool. Okay. I'm gonna assume I'm at my sister's house. Okay. I bet she could rent her backyard out for is it like per hour? Like, what are you looking for? Per hour or per event?
SPEAKER_00Um this is this one particularly is per month. Um, some of them later are per hour.
SPEAKER_02Oh.
SPEAKER_00So like, so let's say you had one event in the month. How much or like you had a couple events through the month? Oh like so say you rent out every weekend, you rent out your okay.
SPEAKER_01If I'm renting out my backyard every weekend, I bet I am making eight thousand dollars.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_01Maybe was I dead on?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it says, no, you weren't dead on at all.
SPEAKER_01But I appreciate that. I was assuming I was assuming a thousand dollars per Friday per Saturday.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so maybe it says between one and three thousand a month. Oh, so oh but maybe you maybe that you don't like do it every weekend. Maybe you don't do it every weekend. Yeah, and I bet for like different events like weddings, it's probably more because it's gonna be like all day. Yeah, yeah. Set up and everything. So the real question is would you be okay with strangers in your backyard? Hell yeah, brother. For a thousand dollars? Yeah, maybe.
SPEAKER_01I have been trying to get a pool at my casa for a long time. So maybe this will turn my spouse.
SPEAKER_00Maybe. What is the weirdest scenario that you would worry about by renting out your pool?
SPEAKER_01So if I had a pool, I would definitely have to have like a pool house because I don't want strangers in my home. So you would have to have like a pool house type situation that probably has a kitchen too, like a bathroom and a kitchen, maybe two bathrooms. So another house? Uh a casita. A little mother-in-law apartment, a little casita on property. Um you're welcome. I'm gonna drink some of this wine. But what I'd be most worried about. I don't know. Just weird stuff happening in the pool. Yeah, yeah. I would probably be worried about that too. Or like just people like destroying your pool.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, somebody pooping in the pool. That's good wine.
SPEAKER_01That's thank you. Uh Code Brown. Code Brown in the pool.
SPEAKER_00Code Brown in the pool. It's not a baby Ruth. Isn't that Caddyshack?
SPEAKER_01I have no idea what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_00Oh, there's a I think it's Caddyshack. It's a movie. Oh, I've never seen it.
SPEAKER_01I mean you know that it's a movie, but I've never seen it.
SPEAKER_00Somebody you have never seen Caddyshack?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because I am not 80 years old.
SPEAKER_00It's a good one! I I don't see really niche movies. It's about golf, yeah. Okay, but there's a part in the in the movie, I'm pretty sure it's Caddyshack, where they get a baby roof and they put it in the pool and all these people are like getting out of the pool. Gross. Because I think it's uh Code Brown. Okay, anyway. Code Brown. Woof, we this is might take us a while. Okay, number two, standing in line for people. Ooh. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I wouldn't want to do that. That's uh why did you think do we need to vote on your last one of what if we would do it? Because yes. Oh, I already said yes, huh? Yeah. Okay, cut that part. Sorry. Start over.
SPEAKER_00Never, I'm never cutting it up. It's so funny. Whatever. It's part of the charm.
SPEAKER_01You literally don't knowing how to do any of this. It's part of the charm. Could you give me like a like a cheat sheet, like a key card that I can just be like, this is what we're doing today?
SPEAKER_00We're gonna have to get you an aide, probably, that just stands next to you and says, nope. Didn't How much does that pay? It's one of your kids. They're busy.
SPEAKER_01They're busy, they have lives. I don't even think a single one of them. Oh, maybe one is home right now.
SPEAKER_00Okay, standing in line for people. So typically this is done in larger cities and often through services like Task Rabbit, oh yeah, and that kind of stuff. But line sitters are often hired for product launches, sneaker drops, um, sometimes Broadway tickets or other other ticket things, um, or even sometimes government document appointments.
SPEAKER_01Okay, I'm gonna guess because this is just such a like a niche thing. Not everybody needs it, uh, not everybody can definitely afford it. I'm gonna assume $250 an hour. $250 an hour? I don't know. Oh, that's probably a bit high. $100 an hour.
SPEAKER_00So and again, I got this from like Google and between Google and chat, bestie. So it's saying between $20 and $50 an hour, sometimes more depending on the length of time that you're sitting or standing or whatever. I just think my time is worth more money.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, probably. And if you have to like sit out in the weather and with other people, if it's overnight, that's gonna be that's gonna be a differential.
SPEAKER_00That's true. We're gonna have to have a night differential. There's gonna be overtime pay.
SPEAKER_01A weekend differential.
SPEAKER_00Do I get benefits? I don't know. Should be paying for health insurance.
SPEAKER_01I don't know. So would you do it? Hey, I'm I'm sitting out here for three hours for you to get these new sneakers. Is that does this come with health insurance? Also, in what I don't know. In what world?
SPEAKER_00Not in this economy, not in Trump's economy, no way.
SPEAKER_01No, uh, would I do it? Not for, did you say $20 to $50 an hour? Yeah. No. Thank you, next.
SPEAKER_00Thank you, next.
SPEAKER_01Or no, what's the trash one? Straight to the trash.
SPEAKER_00Straight to the trash. Oh, yeah, that's right. We were gonna we were gonna rate them. Thank you.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I didn't forget.
SPEAKER_00Maybe no. So yes, yeah. Okay. No, that was. So straight to trash.
SPEAKER_01Straight to trash.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Um, voice acting from home, anywhere from commercial ads, e-learning modules, or even sometimes audiobooks. Um that's a great hustle. That is a great hustle. Yeah. I'm actually sort of considering it now that we have podcasting equipment. I know, right? Um how much would I do?
SPEAKER_01Or oh, I'm guessing how much.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, how much is it? How much do you would you typically make?
SPEAKER_01That one, that last one just humbled me quite a bit. Oh. $45 an hour? Um, this is per month. Per month. Oh, I don't know. Okay. Uh am I doing it full-time?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Or no, it's a cycle. Yeah, part-time.
SPEAKER_01Part-time $2,000 a month.
unknownI don't know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it says it could be up to $5,000 a month, part-time, but some companies will do it per word, like a like a dollar per word or a couple cents per word, depending on what they're having you add.
SPEAKER_01We can say so many words per minute.
SPEAKER_00We know we've been listening to this podcast. Just kidding.
SPEAKER_01Oftentimes in my day-to-day life, I have to be like, hey, you talk so fast you need to slow down. And I will consciously like slow down. Oh.
SPEAKER_00You know, some people like that.
SPEAKER_01Like a lot of the the younger I read the room and I say, Oh, this person doesn't want me talking at Mach 5.
unknownMoch five.
SPEAKER_01Got it. Okay. Is that a speed? Yeah, probably. Thanks. I would do that, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so can you show me one of your vo voice acting um like a like an audition? Audition right now. Try a ridiculous voice live.
SPEAKER_01Ridiculous voice live.
SPEAKER_00Can you do like a really putting me on the spot? I can't do accents.
SPEAKER_01Me either.
SPEAKER_00Noh. That's the Australian one I got. Narr. Nar Dog. Uh would you have like a like a specific niche? Like would you do like audiobooks or would you do like ads?
SPEAKER_01Like I probably wouldn't do audiobooks because those people that do audiobooks um sometimes do like different voices for each character, and that would be a lot to keep straight. Yeah. Like the Harry Potter audiobooks are so good. That oh that um what do we call that person? The audio, the voice actor. The voice actor. He has a different voice for every single person. You don't need him to be like Ron said or Harry said or Hermione because like you get to the point where you're like, I know, I know which voice that is.
SPEAKER_00Interesting. So does he stop saying that? Or no? No, because you read kids just. I think you just read the book. Gotcha.
SPEAKER_01Um yeah, I don't know. I think I could do little commercials like if you've been if you've been injured by a a bad four-way stop, call ANC Law firm. ANC Law firm. Yeah. 1-800, mind your own business.
SPEAKER_00I don't know. 1-800, be predictable. 1-800, get off the road. I like it. Um, so yeah, so if you are a sponsor of any sort, hit us up for audio recording.
SPEAKER_01Like we have nice voices. I've heard people say that like our voices are complimentary.
SPEAKER_00Oh, that's very kind of them. So maybe we could do ads. Yeah. I like it. Okay. I'm gonna manifest it. What would you do? Since you just put me on the spot, what would you do? I mean, I don't know, all of it.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_00I think all of it all at once. Yeah. I think reading audiobooks is like a bigger commitment, but I think you'd get a bigger return for it. So like it it would just be dependent on the time you have. Okay. But yeah. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01I'm gonna look into it. Yeah, do it. Dollar a word? I feel like that's excessive. You probably have to have like I would make like a million dollars an hour.
SPEAKER_00Like, listen, um, Keith Morrison, I would pay that guy. Or or Ludacris. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like those guys are worth at least a dollar a word. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01Let's sell cameos for five dollars. Cameos? Yeah. So people could pay us five dollars for a cameo, like a voice cameo, and then we will call your loved one and tell them happy birthday or yeah, or like any anything you want us to say to them.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01With within reason.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Or not. Or depending on how much you pay me. Yeah. Um, hit us up for that. That'd be cool. I don't yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay, cool. Um, and then the last one in the reasonable section is a mobile noter notary.
SPEAKER_01So you just like verify people's signatures and I actually really thought about that because I see all these videos of people being like, I make one billion dollars doing mobile notary.
SPEAKER_00Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Which makes me think that it's probably not that profitable.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, guess how much it is?
SPEAKER_01I bet you I bet you you have to know somebody that like refers you to their services. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe I'll look into that.
SPEAKER_00Um, how much do I think? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I bet it's a hundred bucks an hour.
SPEAKER_00What would that be a month? It's per month on this one. Sorry, I should have been more consistent.
SPEAKER_01Oh, per month? And I'm doing this as a side hustle. $8,000.
SPEAKER_00It says up to $15,000 plus.
SPEAKER_01What am I even doing here? Seriously. I will be doing that.
SPEAKER_00Uh okay. Let me know.
SPEAKER_01Or not. Have you ever had like a mobile notary come to your house? No. I have like a couple times, uh, maybe like two times, and it's always been like signing mortgage paperwork or whatever. Oh, okay. Um, but it does feel a little sketch because you're just showing up and going into somebody's house.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So there's some danger. So maybe that's yeah, 15, 15k.
SPEAKER_00I'd say more probably for me if I'm gonna be going to someone's house. If I had to travel and be somewhere on time, no. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01I don't know if they're saying I don't think it's you saying no to the job. I think it's the job saying no to you.
SPEAKER_00Well, fine. Let's go into the unhinged but still tempting section. Professional bridesmaid or groomsman. People often hire professional bridesmaids with their when their own friends are like far away or they just don't have like a close circle of friends, and or they need someone to handle high stress situations without the drama.
SPEAKER_01I think this happens five times a year across the world.
SPEAKER_00You think? Yes, that's stupid.
SPEAKER_01Really? Do you have do you have news for me?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. There are popular services such as those from Bridesmaids for Hire, and they range from virtual support to in-person attendance at your wedding. So per wedding, how much do you think you could make?
SPEAKER_01Again, this is gonna be super niche. This is not for the common folk. This is this is yeah, I don't know, like $10,000 for the wedding.
SPEAKER_00So it says between one and $2.5,000 per wedding. Shut up. Yeah. But it could be higher depending on the event and like what you're asked to do. So like some people offer base, like this is actually a very popular thing that people do, mainly in like bigger cities. But they offer like a base package or like different packages.
SPEAKER_01So it's someone that's been super shitty their whole life, and now they're getting married to an equally shitty person, and they're like, Brad, nobody likes us. What are we gonna do? And he's like, Clarissa. Clarissa, we will hire people to be our friends.
SPEAKER_00It's giving Californians.
SPEAKER_01And then he said, SNL. And then Clarissa said, Thank goodness I have my mobile notary job to pay for this.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And then Brad was like, Hell yeah, brother.
SPEAKER_01And then they're like, nah nah, girl. We have that, we have that uh inheritance money. Yeah. That's why nobody likes us. Daddy will pay for it. Generational wealth money. Yeah. That's wild that it is actually more than five times in a year that this occurs.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, apparently it happens quite often. And there's been movies made about it, which I always thought were just like silly things, but yeah. Name one. Wow. This is embarrassing. There's there's been this is embarrassing for you. It's okay, Brad. I don't want to be Brad. Well, you made me Clarissa. I don't know.
unknownTouche.
SPEAKER_00So, like if you did this, let's just say you did this, would you accidentally start drama with the family?
SPEAKER_01Because I probably is it gonna like is there something in my contract that says I can't? Because I don't want to, I don't want to mess up this money.
SPEAKER_00Maybe, but also how fun would that be? Yeah. I l I love a wedding, like a good fun wedding that has like food and alcohol and dancing. Sure. Sign me up. You can pay me to go to a wedding. That's like my favorite thing. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Ones that happen in gymnasiums, not so much, but like a fun wedding. Yeah. Maybe a destination wedding. A destination wedding, yeah. That would be lots more dollars. Are you gonna pay for my airfare?
SPEAKER_01Maybe I'm just not dreaming big enough.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, dream bigger. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Start with your actually pretty fun.
SPEAKER_00So also, if you want to hire me for this, I'd be great. So, but then how far are you taking the friendship afterwards? Like is it is it contract? No, it's over. I doubt that, knowing who you are as a person. You would be best friends.
SPEAKER_01I'd be their emotional support person. But I'd probably be like in the middle of that Brad and Clarissa relationship.
SPEAKER_00And I am you're their marriage therapist, you're their you know, when when she's happy. They're gonna have to put me on a retainer.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, they're gonna have to put me on a retainer.
SPEAKER_00You're the family stand-in.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Oh man. Better pay good.
SPEAKER_00All right. So drum roll, please. We're up to the next one, which is um one that people always joke about selling feet picks. Yes, it's real. Yes, it is lucrative.
SPEAKER_01There is there is some there is a a niche for everybody. There's any any weird thing you want to do, there's an audience for it. Yeah. There is how much are people making per month doing this?
SPEAKER_00And I'm gonna tell you it's a it's a wild number. Big range. $850,000.
SPEAKER_01No, like a range. Give me a range. Oh, I'm gonna say low end. You're just getting you're just new to it, maybe like $200,000. No, sorry. Let's start over.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Give me a r- I'm gonna give you a range.
SPEAKER_01Like $15,000 a month to your your puppy dogs are well sought after. I'm gonna go eight hundred and fifty thousand. Jesus was that too big?
SPEAKER_00A hundred dollars to one K a month, depending on. On how consistent you are and what platforms you're on, and if you're like a verified person. So you said the high end is a thousand a month. That's what it says.
SPEAKER_01That's not worth it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I know. But you can do this anonymously. So there's some sites that allow you to be like anonymous and do this. You don't have to show your face, you don't have to do anything weird. Then weirder than getting your feet pictures taken. But like it it also depends on the photo. Like if you have like if you're just taking a picture of your feet just how they are, versus like someone like you holding a pedicure.
SPEAKER_01You holding toes with your friend. Yeah. Those ones, those ones are pricey. Should we do it? You have socks on.
SPEAKER_00I I know, because I've made it a mission not to show my feet on this podcast because you can't get that for free. And I got slippies on. Yeah. That you're gonna have to pay for that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Also, let Ashley know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, let me know. So have you considered it? Of course I have. Of course we've all considered it. And what is your I do it for X amount of money?
SPEAKER_01Um I would do it for $2,000 a month.
SPEAKER_00No, probably $3,000 a month. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00All right. I like it. Okay, moving on. Renting chickens.
SPEAKER_01Hold on. I have nice feet, so like I think I would be um I think I'd be on the the upper end of things. See, that's the thing is my husband says my feet are nice. Okay. My mom thinks I'm cool.
SPEAKER_00They they say I'm pretty. The friends that I've hired tell me I'm really nice. Brad and Clarissa said they love my feet. I love that those are just the names. Like we don't even have I don't think I know anybody in my life named Clarissa.
SPEAKER_01No, I don't know a single person. Or Brad.
SPEAKER_00Or Brad, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Actually, I do know Brad.
SPEAKER_00Those are like 80 friends, like villain names. Because there are villains. That's why nobody likes them. All right. Okay, go. Um, renting chickens. So this is a try before you buy type of situation. People want to see if having chickens is their jam.
SPEAKER_01So at the end of the season, they want to see if it's all it's cracked up to be.
SPEAKER_00Get out.
SPEAKER_01Oh, oh, I have a funny joke for you. Sorry. No, no, never mind. No, we're not doing jokes. Clearly. Sidam game. You can't you can't diss my joke and then be like, but I have a joke for you.
SPEAKER_00Okay, go. Why was six afraid of seven? Because at eight, nine. Six, seven. But is my part right? Oh. Six. Seven. Six, seven. Six, seven. I don't get it. Six? Seven. Six, seven. I still don't get it. You know, like six, seven? I know six, seven. Sick? Like illness?
SPEAKER_01Oh, sick.
SPEAKER_00Six, seven.
SPEAKER_01And that's why six doesn't like seven because six is seven is sick. That was such a good one. I loved it.
SPEAKER_00This wine is really working. I like it. Christy made this wine. I did. BT Doves. She's that twine coach. She's getting me litty titty on a Wednesday.
SPEAKER_01You've had three sips. Get it together.
SPEAKER_00Wow. Okay. Mama. Yeah, so it's not. It's cracked up to be. Um, people generally do a try before you buy situation. Um, and at the end of the season, people either return everything or choose to adopt the hens and keep them permanently. How much do you think people will pay you? So you're the one renting your chickens outside. Okay. So you uh have these chickens that you're $700 a month. Oh. So this says $250 to $400 per season. Oh, for the whole season. Yeah, yeah, I can see that. Yeah. For the full season. All I want is an emotional support chicken. I don't want to have to do the work.
SPEAKER_01We had chickens a long time ago when we moved into our current residence. We got some chickens because I was like, I want fresh eggs. This is great. Let's do it. No. Back in the day when eggs were super cheap, and so we were buying all this feed, and the feed that we were buying was like way more expensive than the few eggs that it would produce. And also around that time, like we were kind of letting them free range in our yard because we had we have like a nice big yard. Um, but then we got hawks that kind of took up residence in our yard because we had the chickens, so then we had to keep the chickens in the coop.
SPEAKER_02Oh no.
SPEAKER_01And like they had the like a small fenced-off area. It was like four by four or something. Um, so they weren't living their best lives, and it was so dirty. Chickens just do nothing but eat and poop. Eat and poop. Um, it was just gross. It attracted rats.
SPEAKER_00Oh, okay, not worth it. No things.
SPEAKER_01Just no. It wasn't the the juice wasn't worth the squeeze. Is that that's a term, right? Yes, it is. You've heard that. I have the juice isn't worth the squeeze. Don't keep saying it. It doesn't make it better. I'm gonna Google it. I know it is. It isn't worth the squeeze.
SPEAKER_00That's so funny. Gross squeeze. Please tell me that it was like honey no something. People say that. People say that. People say that. Yeah. Sure, Jen. Okay. Can we move on? Or do you still want to I please tell me you're not Googling that from a work account?
SPEAKER_01It's a very common thing.
SPEAKER_00Hey, how was your day? Uh the juice wasn't worth the squeeze.
SPEAKER_01I don't think your day was worth the squeeze.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_01Let's go.
SPEAKER_00Next. Okay, so now we're getting into fully unhinged territory. Okay. You're ready. Professional cuddler. So these are people who I don't like it. Cuddle people professionally, and sessions can last from 60 minutes to several hours. Activities include hugging, hand holding, spooning, or just sitting together in comfortable silence. It is fully consensual, and both partners set firm boundaries beforehand, and the idea is that there's no like you both partners are clothed.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, there's rules.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, there's rules. Um, what's my price range per hour for this one? $35 per hour. Oh, good one. So um it says between $40 and $80 per hour. Oh. However, some highly successful practitioners in major cities like New York report making up to $100,000 a year, often working only a few hours a day.
SPEAKER_01Which Because I bet you the clients on those ones are freaking.
SPEAKER_00And I it makes me kind of sad because it feels a little bit predatory for those people who don't have like that physical touch in their life, and then other people are sort of like oh, predatory to the person that wants to be cuddled. Yeah. Isn't that kind of sad to you?
SPEAKER_01I don't know. Ethically, it feels a little yucky. Yucky. Oh, it's super yucky, but um why doesn't anyone never mind. Never mind.
SPEAKER_00I don't know. You know what I mean though? Like this person's clearly lonely or doesn't have someone in their life that they could get this from for free, so they're paying somebody. That makes me so sad.
SPEAKER_01I'm more sad for the person doing it.
SPEAKER_00Oh, it feels predatory to me.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I look at it the opposite way that it's predatory towards this person that just needs money in their life. Oh, yeah. Come snuggle me. Yeah. Because because I've done something in my life that nobody wants to be around me.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And honestly, at the end of the day, this is the world we've created, right? Not to get like super serious and dark, but like this capitalistic hellscape of needing money, like has driven us to do these things too. Like cuddling people when yeah. Straight to trash. Okay, I agree, straight to trash. It feels yucky all around for both parties. But you know what? We don't yuck others' yums, so like do it, lady. Do do what makes you feel good.
SPEAKER_01So you can say yuck somebody else's yum, but I can't say the juice wasn't worth the squeeze. Yes, that doesn't make any sense. It's more visual.
SPEAKER_00Gross. Yuck my yum. You're making me sad. Okay. Okay, and on that note, um yuck my yum. Professional mourner.
SPEAKER_01That goes hand in hand with like hiring your bridesmaids.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so apparently, according to Google, this has been a profession for thousands of years, is what it said. I know. And they says they're known as moirologists. M-O-I-R-O. I believe you. L-O-G-I-S-T-S. I don't know how you'd say that. Moire Moirologists. A professional mourner's role can vary from being a silent supporter who blends in with the crowd to a dramatic whaler who performs loud like.
SPEAKER_01Listen, I need you to come to this event and you need to be a loud mourner. What'd you call a whaler? I mean a whaler.
SPEAKER_00So in some cases, they are hired to act as long-lost friends or distant relatives to ensure a funeral isn't poorly attended.
SPEAKER_01Okay, also, what have you done in your life that nobody wants to come? A lot of these jobs are a result of people's poor behavior.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Um, I don't know, 60 bucks an hour.
SPEAKER_00So it can be between 50 to 200 bucks per funeral, sometimes up to $500, depending on the circumstances for which you were hired.
SPEAKER_01So if you were hired to be like if you want me, if you want tears and me to fall to my knees, that's gonna be $200. Yeah. Uh a light brushing of a tissue, that's more in the $50 range.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01They have a they have a whole little cue card and it's like, how far do you want to go?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, for sure. If you want me to just stand in the back. Also, I don't think I could do this because funerals make me feel yucky. I don't like it.
SPEAKER_01Like I don't know. Okay. Okay, I would be really good at it because I, when others cry, I cry. So if I see other people crying, oh, I can I can whip out those tears. And not even whip them out. They just they just flow and they're they're very genuine. Good.
SPEAKER_00Because I'm sad for somebody that's sad. You're a good person. Thank you. I don't think I could do it.
SPEAKER_01So when you're at a funeral and others are crying, you don't feel the urge to cry.
SPEAKER_00No, I think I do, but usually if I go to if I can get myself to go to a funeral, it's because it's somebody that I really know and really love or care about. So I'm already gonna be crying. Okay. But funerals in general make I I don't like them. Like I just like body and a like looking at I don't know how to say it other than like it is a very bizarre thing. Like I like more of like the celebration of life that people do.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. But it is not for the person that died. It is for the family.
SPEAKER_00It is, and I I just get very uncomfortable with the idea. Like, I've been to funerals, I've been to a lot of funerals in my life, and sometimes the people will kiss the person, like that kind of stuff. I understand it. I people grieve in very interesting ways, but I can I can't do it. And like an open casket thing, I don't get it. I don't it just I don't get it.
SPEAKER_01I feel like you're like tempting fate right now.
SPEAKER_00And and also another thing on that the idea of someone I loved being put in a box six feet under the ground makes me like physically ill. Okay. Cause I'm very claustrophobic. Alright, we have discovered something about Ashley today. I don't like that idea. Like yeah. Okay. Noted. Yeah. So burn me.
SPEAKER_01If you if just I mean you're gonna be burned like a witch, but either way, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I am a witch. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's what I'm saying. You're gonna be burned.
SPEAKER_00Anyways, okay. Um I then you'll fly off on your broom. Yeah, don't hire me to be your professional mourner because I can't do it.
SPEAKER_01Okay, that's weird.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it is weird. This is the next one, it's weirder, surprisingly. I believe it. Are you ready to gag? Oh. Pet food taste tester. Oh, of course that's a thing. So while it sounds unappealing, it is a critical quality control step for major pet food companies. Professional tasters, get this. Professional tasters don't just sit down to a bowl of kibble. They use a highly methodical process similar to wine tasting. Smell first, palate testing, spit don't swallow, nutritional analysis. Uh uh-uh. No. This is giving, this is part of the reason why I had started It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, like long ago, and then I had to stop because they were eating cat food. Charlie in a couple of the episodes. It grosses me out so much.
SPEAKER_01Why aren't they testing it on animals to see if like nine out of ten dogs like it? They can't give like feedback.
SPEAKER_00Did they eat it? But like texture, I don't know, but the I don't know, man. Google it. It says it's a thing.
SPEAKER_01Oh my gosh. I don't know. I'm sure it makes a lot of money because that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. We're just really making $40 an hour.
SPEAKER_0040 to 60 an hour. Oh my gosh. You could not pay me. You could you I you would I would have to make at least like I don't even know. I can't even We live in an area where you can smell dog food in the air sometimes, and I cannot. I can't. I remember being pregnant one time and having to run into work because smells were really bad for me.
SPEAKER_01I don't I don't know if that's like a an hourly thing, because how could you sit there for a whole hour and try dog food?
SPEAKER_00Different brands, different or like different types within the same brand. So, like, you know, like they have the puppy one and then they have soft foods and adults and seniors and allergy ones and wow. Okay, we can't get we can't talk about it anymore because I'm that one's a no for me too. Yeah, there's there's no money you could. I would rather be a professional mourner. Okay. Selling your used clothing, like socks, underwear, sports bras. Yeah. How much?
SPEAKER_01It's probably based per item, right? I bet you could make like per it says per month.
SPEAKER_00I didn't it didn't say per month.
SPEAKER_01$2,000 per month.
SPEAKER_00Correct. Between $200 and $2,000 a month. But some top sellers have made way more than that. That's easy.
SPEAKER_01I'll do it.
SPEAKER_00But they have to be worn. And I'll do it. I wear everyone. The longer worn, the higher the price. Okay. Um, I did have a friend, two friends, my friend Devin and Becky. Um, they went to Japan and they told me that there are vending machines there that you can buy like used underwear out of.
SPEAKER_01This one you can buy a cupcake vending machine. This one is used clothing. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Isn't that bizarre? That's gross. Um, so but there's a market. There's a market for it. Again. Are we above this? No, that's easy. That is easy. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01If you can if you could give me 2,000 bucks for like a hamper full of dirty clothes upstairs.
SPEAKER_00You mean you have a whole hamper full of cash, is what you're telling me.
SPEAKER_01I do. It's just rotting.
SPEAKER_00Okay, this one I kind of want to do because of who I am. Naming people's babies. People? Apparently, people like parents will outsource naming their child.
SPEAKER_01Is it because they're in a fight? Is it because Brad and Clarissa are in a fight over what to name the baby, or like, oh, I gotta name this thing, but I'm too busy.
SPEAKER_00I don't know. Maybe both. Oh my gosh. Clarissa wants Reginald and Brad wants like Chuck.
SPEAKER_01Well, that's probably still part of my like duties because they've kept me on retainer from their thing. So now I have to name their baby. But you have to like kind of give in to both sides. Uh, that'd be hard. Or you just do what you want.
SPEAKER_00Like your baby's name is yellow. Your baby's name is Casserole. We'll call her Cass for short. Tater tot. But really, do you go safe with it or do you just like ruin that kid's life? No, safe. I'm all about the safe names. All right, fine. No, not fun. Safe names. I'm naming her Taylor Rex. So she can go by T-Rex?
SPEAKER_01I like it. Yeah. I like it.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Um professional line breaker, breakupper. So like you call people to break up with. Oh. Ooh. How much?
SPEAKER_01Well, I guess it would probably depend on the length of the relationship. If it's just like a little relationship, I would say um $30 and I'll call them breakup. But if it's like a long-term thing, it's and I'm gonna have to stay on the phone for a bit, and you know I get stuck in conversations. Probably a hundred bucks.
SPEAKER_00So is it per phone call? It's probably per phone call. Okay. Let me see. I just lost it. Oh, yeah. So this is saying $30 to $100 per breakup. So there's actually a guy that delivers bad news on TikTok. Have you seen those videos? He has done this before. And it's pretty funny, actually. I love it. So check that guy out. I don't have a I don't have a handle for you because I can't remember what his name is, but I'm sure it'll come up now that we're talking about it.
SPEAKER_01And I bet you he now people just do it because it's like that's the cool thing to do.
SPEAKER_00And it's not just breakups, he does like deliver bad news and that kind of stuff. So anyway. Um is he delivering like poor diagnoses? Oh, I hope people don't ask source for that.
SPEAKER_01They're just doctor's office that's like, listen.
SPEAKER_00You gotta call this person and tell them they've got chlamydia.
SPEAKER_01No, the patient gets to opt in. Do you want me to call you or do you want, you know, fast talking rod over here?
SPEAKER_00He just gives you the bullet points. Yeah. We'll do it in a character if you ask nicely.
SPEAKER_01Well, that's extra.
SPEAKER_00Okay. That's all I have for you today. It's just some fun little side hustle things. Okay. So do you have any any to add? Like, have you thought of side hustles that like I haven't covered here?
SPEAKER_01Like selling stuff on Etsy, of course, but then it's goes back to the like, oh, then I'd have to prepare something because it'd probably be something like crafty that I'd have to make. Yeah. Don't want to be doing that.
SPEAKER_00And then you run into that issue of like if it takes off, then you're like, oh.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I have to do this?
SPEAKER_01Um side hustle. I don't even know.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Maybe you should charge people to run marathons for them. No. Under their name.
SPEAKER_01I'll run it for you at a average pace.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_00You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_01But then they pay for the race, and that the race is the fun part.
SPEAKER_00Maybe they just want the metal.
SPEAKER_01Okay. I could do that one. Do you want to just tell me? I'll run it for you. I'll buy your name. Okay. And a face mask. So which ones are we trying? Uh notary. I would do that one. Um, professional breaker upper feet, selling my worn clothing. Absolutely. Because then I could like replace it.
SPEAKER_00There's like all the weird ones. Not like renting your backyard or oh, I forgot about that.
SPEAKER_01That was a long time ago. I um my spouse is very averse to people and crowds, so I think he would hate if I rented out our backyard.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but would he love the cash?
SPEAKER_01I don't know. I don't know if the juice would be worth the squeeze.
SPEAKER_00Oh my god, stop trying to make it happen.
SPEAKER_01Never.
SPEAKER_00Ask, ask your husband, is this juice worth the squeeze?
SPEAKER_01Uh no, that one would be hard though, because you'd have to well, maybe if people brought their own direct decorations. I mean parking. I'm not good at decorating. No. I got plenty of parking ground here.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, no. Not me.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01I live in the burbs. I'd probably do most of those things if the price was right, which we said maybe sometimes they were right and sometimes. They weren't.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Sometimes you just gotta hustle. So okay.
SPEAKER_01Well, listeners, let us know which side hustles you want us to do, or if you want to buy my clothing.
SPEAKER_00Should we do a vlog where we try some of these things? I'm not trying the pet foods. Don't even come at me. I'm not doing that.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's a that's a hard no.
SPEAKER_00That's a hard no. Hard no. But like other things.
SPEAKER_01You don't just walk into test pet or testing pet foods. Like, you gotta be like that. That takes a minute to get into. That one's too hard.
SPEAKER_00I feel like you could probably just do it from home if you have a pet.
SPEAKER_01Guarantee it takes some qualifications.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, probably.
SPEAKER_01I got cat food upstairs. You want me to go get it? No. No. Tastes gross.
SPEAKER_00No. It tastes gross.
SPEAKER_01It smells gross. Sorry. I've never tasted it, but it does smell gross.
SPEAKER_00Should she just eat some on cracker?
SPEAKER_01Sometimes I don't know. Sometimes you get it on your hand and then it's like.
SPEAKER_00Okay. No. No, we're done. Okay, so this has been Two Brains One Bot. I'm Ashley. Mrs. Christy. And we wish you well on your side hustle journey.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, let us know what side hustles you do and if we've missed any good ones. Yep. And if we and let us know if you want us to send you a cameo for five dollars.
SPEAKER_00And if we were to set up some sort of subscription thing, if you'd be interested. I think you can set up like a Patreon and people can like buy you a coffee or whatever. I think that'd be kind of fun.
SPEAKER_01I think just send us a coffee.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah. Or just bring me coffee. This is my plea for coffee.
SPEAKER_01At this hour in this economy? Yeah, dude. I don't even have a watch on. I I pretended. Okay. Let's end it.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Um, yeah, that's all we've got. What else do we oh yeah. Go ahead and start us off with our tagline, Christy. This has been Two Brains One Bot.
SPEAKER_01An episode about side hustles.
SPEAKER_00She's just gonna keep avoiding it.
SPEAKER_01Remember, stay human. Stay curious. And don't let the robots get you.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_00No? That's it. Don't let the robots win.
SPEAKER_01Oh, don't let the robots win. They've already won.
unknownBye.
SPEAKER_00Goodbye. Oh, that's funny.
Podcasts we love
Check out these other fine podcasts recommended by us, not an algorithm.
everybody has a secret
Shameless Media
This Is Important
iHeartPodcasts
The Dating Detectives
Dear Media
Morbid
Ash Kelley & Alaina Urquhart
Justifying The F Word
Quinn and Megan Brown
Elevate Utah Podcast
Elevate Utah
MrBallen Podcast: Strange, Dark & Mysterious Stories
Ballen Studios
I've Had It
Jennifer Welch and Angie Sullivan
IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson
Higher Ground
Criminal
Vox Media Podcast Network
The Rest Is Science
Goalhanger